I don’t care what you think about me, I don’t think about you at all – Coco Chanel
I wish I could live by that! Or in some aspects of my life I do, when I get hate messengers from random people I really don’t care! I feel sorry for them for feeling the need to spread hate, at the same time as I am impressed that someone cares enough about me to take time to write me a message like that, I answer them polite back.
But when it comes to people that I care about, that I thought cared about me, that I helped, gave money to, and then I suddenly wake up and sees that what I thought was not right at all. Then I get sad and I wish I could switch on the Coco Chanel quote!
Where does the generous and helpful thing start and where does it go?
When I was young I really learned the value of money from my parents, okey, I got what I wished for from Santa, and they always bought me one very expensive bridel instead of 5 cheep once, and Levi’s, Miss Sixty and Gant clothes for school. No problem, but not tons of it. I could get the coolest clothes before school started at the summer, I could get a new dress for Christmas if I grew out of last years one. And I would get new clothes for 17 of may, the National day of Norway!
Sometimes my mom would take me to the summer sale, and I would get some clothes that was on sale, normally a size a little big, so they would fit next year!
I was brought up with that help does not cost money, if someone needed help I would help out even if it took all day or all weekend. No questions or even thoughts about getting money for it.
If I was so lucky to get to help out the older girls to muck out and feed the ridingschool horses in the weekend I was honored! Although they ware a lot stronger and faster than me, and that I got tired I was so glad and felt so lucky to get to help them and be a part of it! To learn! I even worked so much with heavy wheelbarrows and hay bale lifting that I got a tendon inflammation in my wrist on both hands. Of course I shut up about the pain, I was so scared my parents would not let me go and help out, I wanted to reach the older girls level, and not sink down, or even worse bring them down with me. The continuing of work combine with being naughty in school so ha teacher grabbed me by the wrist, lifted me up and shook me repeatedly gave so much pain I could no longer hide it from my parents, and yes, all of us had to go to the principals office.
I got a week point in my wrists that had followed me trough life, but I am not sad about it! All the things I learned helping out at the ridingschool was important for getting me to where I am today!
I do think that you should care deeply about your health, and not over do it! If you are in a situation where you feel you can’t handle the work load, speak to your boss, tell them that you are inspired to get as good as the rest of the team, and maybe even better, but right now you need to maybe work a little lighter a couple of times a week! On your way to become as strong as the rest of the guys!
It’s a lot of roads that leads to Rome
And if you have Passion about horses and riding it’s a couple of ways to become better, learn and become good!
I could muck 12 boxes just to be allowed to ride 30 min on a Norwegian horse!Photos borrowed from google
I would get up on any trotting horse, the heavy and the light once! If the owner would let me do a jump on them I would try with a big smile! I would much out and ride as many horses I could! So if someone was going on holding I would always be the first to offer to take care of their horses and get to ride it a little! Even though I had two horses of my own! It’s the hours in the saddle that gives a rider it’s feeling! You can learn it on any horse, for some people it’s just there, for other people it takes a little work and for some it takes a lot!
It depends also on your attitude for the horse, and to be able and be in the NOW! The horse can feel a fly on his body, if we have to kick hard 3 times to get the horse to go it’s something that is not right! All horses are sensitive, but they can be desensitize by the rider.
The horses you want to learn on at first as a beginner must have a huge room for the rider to make mistakes, while you get better you learn to feel the reaction of the horse when you give a gentle push with the leg, or when you sit up a little more as at the same time squeeze the reins a little to ask him to wait. To know what you want the horse to do before you do it, and feel the reaction of the horse, to reward if it was correct, and to make a correction in the answer the horse gave you if it was not what you asked!
EVERYBODY can learn this! No matter age! You just have to be relaxed and concentrated! + a good instructor
Or if you are lucky enough to have a big income or parents that can buy you loads of riding lessons and horses that’s a very good way to go and learn fast!
But if you don’t have that, it’s a good idea to be positive and grateful for any horse you would be allowed to ride! Specially if you are on a lower level and someone is kind enough to let you borrow a good well educated horse. Be grateful for any horse you are allowed to ride and be humble, it’s you that have to learn, even if you are a good rider, you can always be better, no matter what horse or situation
When I got older I got loads of jobs, I had two children that had problems I was paid to hang out with, they tagged along with me where ever I went, stables and so on.
I had a job to wash offices, I worked in the reception of a hotel, I washed rooms at a motel and I gave lessons two different places and went to college full time.
It was busy but very fun! My life has continued in full speed! I love to be active! And I love to help people and share with me of the material things I am so blessed to have now! I have given my grooms handbags to 5000 euro, Apple laptop, expensive accessories and so on. And for my fiends, brand clothes, and my ridingpants, Louis Vuitton and Gucci bags, scarfs, money if they needed, I’m happy to do it! And I hope I will be able to do it my whole life.
People tell me I should not do this kind of stuff because it does not end good, and I guess I have that experience also. But I’m still very happy to have done it anyway. Because how I see something, is the truth for me, and how someone else see something is the truth for them. It’s the same situation with two different truths.
I want to EMPHASIS that if someone or someone does something that you feel is bad for you, does not mean it will make it better to get even or to talk bad about that person. To put blame. It does not mean that revenge is okey just because your friends agree with you, you should not justify it like that! We should all try to talk to the person it concerns with a open heart! Give second chances and be grateful and happy! And try not to start a discussion with friends about someone else. That’s the first step to hurt someone.
I do a lot, and when I don’t have to much headache I can stand a lot of work. And then it can be hard for other people to follow. But that’s okey. By taking and being positive solutions can easy come. Spreading rumors and twisting the truth makes drama, and it’s normally never a solution. I do have A LOT of stuff I have to work on to be a better person, I do try! When I have a lot of headache I can be a nightmare for ❤️Francois, because I get very irritated and not pleasant to be around. So we have made a plan, if the headache is to strong I tell him, I have pain, I’m irritated, don’t talk to me. Like that we can avoid fights.
But I have to say when I have a disagreement with someone I care about I get sad, and I did not want to blog this last week and weekend. Not because I did not have time,but because I just needed to be in the now!
Something I have experienced in the past is that I become very good friends with my groom, so when I say something to them after a period here, let’s say that needs to be done in a different way or just something, they can be sad cause they see me as a friend, and not a friend but also the respect as a boss. But with most of the girls we both have been able to see how much fun we have had together and been able to stay friends! I have also recommended them to other jobs, and always send a happy though their way hoping they have tons of fun, in a job they really love! Sometimes grooms are you and want to rest different jobs every 6 months, and that’s fine to, we have to respect that and give them our best recommendation so they can get a awesome job after also!
I am far from perfect, but I have a list to remind me of things I want to do better:
- Make a daily plan, before 13.00 the day before, and give the info to the people it concerns as soon as possible! Maybe eve. 2 days before if you can
- Talk to and not about
- Use the list of what you have to do to be more structured,
- Use your notebook so you will remember all in one day
- Be effective but take time to explain people in a calm and positive way
- Clean up in the kitchen right after dinner
- Talk to and not about
- Be sure to always say things with a positive voice